Thankful for a Beautiful Christmas!

“Thankful” by Josh Groban

Somedays we forget
To look around us
Somedays we can’t see
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give.

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can’t see.
It’s up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There’s so much to be thankful for.

Look beyond ourselves
There’s so much sorrow
It’s way too late to say
I’ll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It’s so long overdue

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can’t see
It’s up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There’s so much to be thankful for.

Even with our differences
There is a place we’re all connected
Each of us can find each other’s light

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for
What we still can’t see
It’s up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more

There’s so much to be thankful for

Merry Christmas everyone!!!!! ♥


New life, please?

Can I get a new life, please?

Well, maybe just a new academic life…

I really suck at studying…

…and focusing…

…and being a good student…


Harsh Realities

You know what really sucks?

Forgetting it even happened.

Actually, you never really forget because the hole that it caused is always in you…always eating at your soul…always causing an emptiness that can never be filled.

All you can really do is hide the tears that well up inside of you.

I must be strong. I must get through this. It was nine years ago and, although I shouldn’t forget, I can’t let it take over.

The only reason why I remembered it happened was because my friend mentioned a similar story and how she couldn’t cry because she had to sing.

I could feel the tears in each eye just ready to stream down my cheeks.

I know that my friend on the other side of the table could see something and I wonder if they could hear the story being told and remembered my story.

I had to get away from the table we were all sitting at, so I stood to throw away my cup and napkin.

Then, the feeling went away sort of.

It was only until we all got up to walk toward the cars that my friend put her arm around me because it seemed like she could sense my distress.

Of course, this usually makes me cry harder…so all of a sudden my cheeks were wet with tears.

Good thing it was nighttime and the streetlights weren’t that bright.

Our other friends walked ahead of us and I was glad that no one turned around or else I would’ve sobbed right there in the parking lot.

Talking is NOT an option when I’m about to cry or when I am crying, so I didn’t even try to say why I was so sad.

I texted my friend and told her exactly the reason for my tears because she had been there a couple times previously when I told my story.

I knew she would understand or at least just be a shoulder for me to cry on.

My friends were all dropped off at their places and, as my other friend that was driving me pulled up to where she usually drops me off, I told her what was going on also.

I think she could sense that I was on the verge of crying, so she didn’t ask.

I was also glad that she could tell I didn’t feel like talking about it.

My gosh, nine years…already?

…and it still makes me sob…

This is definitely something I will never, ever be able to forget.

…and no one will ever know what it feels like unless it happens to them…which sucks.

Well, all I can say is I’m glad that I know so many amazing people who understand me so well.

Currently listening to: “This Woman’s Work” by Maxwell.

(If you are wondering, read some of my first blogs posts. Particularly, this one.)

Be kind.

Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

Now how many times have I heard that quote?

Plenty of times.

It’s sooo true! Someone could be having the worst day of their lives: the car broke down, they spilled coffee on their new white shirt, they were unprepared for a meeting, they lost an earring backing (those little suckers!), they had a button pop off of their jacket, and on top of all of this…they had eyeliner smudged on their face and no one told them… Of course, that last part would only be for a woman…maybe.

Not to mention the fact that, on a daily basis, many people get phone calls that someone close to them ended up in the hospital, the house burned down, or one of their pets was hit by a car…etc. Basically, the worst of the worst.

And yet, there are some people out there in this world who have all of this happen to them, and, somehow, everywhere they go, they appear to be their normal, happy, cheery selves. They are able to live on when they have nothing else to live for…when there is no more hope to hold onto…

There are those that hide their battle scars…those that don’t want others to know they are fighting a tough battle…those that are walking a difficult journey right now…but they don’t want to burden others with their troubles. They don’t want to appear weak. They don’t want to make others uncomfortable because no one else would know exactly what they were going through at that very moment.

If we just assume that everyone is hurting and searching for answers…if we just do one kind thing per day…if we just reach out to someone we love…maybe the world will someday be a better place to live in.

Maybe living will have another purpose one day.